Why 'Gotards'?

WARNING: See the Disclaimer before you hurt yourself....

From gotards.com

Yeah, I know: 'Why "gotards.com"? Isn't that some sort of a slur or a crime or a [insert misused borderline scary noun here]?'

Actually, I bounced this off a gotard I know, and he totally dug it. He laughed; he cried; he drooled.

Okay: I'm joking; I wasn't even in the room, or for that matter the state. But I do know this guy with cerebral palsy who has a sense of humour and a wheelchair, and who, on hearing this idea, declared himself the Official Mascot of Gotards Dot Com. Which is a bit inaccurate, since he's actually pretty smart. That's a given though: a dumb cripple woulda been all offended.

Incidentally, the image in the upper left isn't actually a shot of this guy; it's a vector I drew in Flash5 a few years ago. I know: that seems obvious; but dumb people might come here, and who else would really have to ask 'Why "Gotards"?'; I like to play it safe.

UPDATE: I just hit UrbanDictionary.com for the first time since...before I got gotards.com in November 2002; in July 2003, this was added: gotards One [sic] who is [sic] mentally handicaped. So, that sounds like pretty much every twit I tend to encounter, doesn't it.

I actually don't care about gotards. Or retards. Or bastards. Or mustard. I have no opinion. I'm not for or against them. But, to be real, 'gotards' is a common vernacular colloquialism with modern uses beneath and beyond actual cripples. It's pretty much any dead bug in the genepool. Also, long since I grabbed this domain, the trend in marketing [talk about a tardly concept] has begun to switch from iNoun to Gonoun, which slays me: I envision people iPhoning their ways into gotards.com for some mobile mental midgets throughout the day. Gotards; 'tards on the go; ETards. That would be so cool.

It doesn't mean anything. If you don't believe me, ask your lawyer; if you don't believe him, ask mine after you lose. No one cares. Meaning that I don't care. Meaning that no one I care about cares. If you care, then I'm not someone whose full attention you're likely to want in your heart of hearts anyway; go save someone else.

Since we're here: 'Why "cripple"? Isn't that a [more borderline scary nouns]?'

I don't mind it. David [our Official Gotard] doesn't mind it. And, if I need to qualify this: I've got chronic migraine and I fell to my death* several years ago, causing my portside leg to be a centimetre shorter than my good one. So: I don't mind being identified as a cripple, and neither does any cripple I care about. End of issue.

*Except for the part where I didn't die

--Gremlin